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Why would you be reading this if you knew how to do it? So when you hire us to market your website, don't tell us what to do, just look at the results. We could show you fancy charts, and all that struff to try to impress you, but that's just smoke and mirrors.
We like results, not charts. Try one month of marketing with us and if you don't see an instant return on your investment, we will let you fire someone from our marketing team (fire John please, he's annoying and eats too much kale) right then and there.
We know what works.
Our marketing hasn't been tested
It just works! Why would you need to test something that is just so awesome that is has increased leads by over 23% with all of our clients?!! Wait, maybe we did test it a bit. No, scratch that, we’re sticking with ‘never tested’. Our marketing will have you talking to so many new people that you'll feel like a crooked politician newly running for office.
Think about the last time you read this much on a boring website! You probably haven't, unless is was something from Hemingway, but then he is wildly awesome. If you hire our marketing copy writers, they will get down to the core of your company content and make it interesting to read.
Note: they charge extra to take out profanity.
Copywriting Legends
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